Wednesday, May 11, 2011

3am Ramblings

I never hated you, not even a little bit. Not for what you did, not for what you said, not even for what you chose to omit. I always hated that you were so predictable...

I knew that we were wrong, knew it would and could never work... To make it worse I always knew it was the last time, that there would be no happy ending, that the stars would never align for us..

What I hated the most was the fact that when all the cards were dealt, you failed to surprise me... you chose to follow suit.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.9

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Ok ok... let the comparisons begin. lol

Comment null and void due to my having to change the video :/
I haven't had one of these in so long, just looking at this picture is sending my saliva glands into a frenzy...

This summers TO-DO List
1. Get my splits back
2. Learn to play guitar
3. Find a summer-fling that will propose his temporary allegiance to me with a ring pop.


Hanging in Suspension

Before I start ranting again, I'd just like to say, I hate feet.

Anyway I just... happened to be doing some random shit in the middle of the floor and I thought, how long have I been holding this same position? Balancing on one foot, afraid to make my next step... How long have I been surviving in limbo not belonging to any particular school of thought? How long have I been wasting my time in a place that is neither here nor there? And finally, WHY have I stayed?! Why haven't I moved? One foot in front of the other seems so easy when you've got your momentum, but the moment you choose to stand still... all logic fails.

" driven to the point of emotional unavailability."

This couldn't be closer to my reality. Smh.

"Can't you see how my heart yearns to misbehave?"

So... I'm bored. And in the midst of all my boredom I began to think, and back track, and reflect, and analyze... and I thought ab the age old question "Why don't you have a boyfriend, girl?!" Instead of giving the usual, long-winded reply of "because I refuse to settle for something I really don't want, and def don't need for the sake of a title," I sat and thought ab the question. Yes, it's probably HIGHLY unusual that I've been in only one (side-eye) relationship and I'm damn near 21, but my standby question is No but really, I'm not one to share my demons with everyone that gives me a puzzled stare after I respond, but SHIT.

I admit, I'm afraid of commitment. And for me, that's fine. I don't think you should anchor yourself to anything in life but your family. Only one thing is constant in life, and that is change, so WHY in the hell would I try to begin something concrete and meaningful at such a transitory period?! It took me awhile to figure it out, but it just doesn't make sense! I think it goes back to the age-old mentality that "women of marrying age should be preparing to court, fuck, and live a long monotonous life of submission and service," and I refuse to feed into it.

On the other hand, don't you people in happy and healthy relationships have better things to do than ask me ab my love life? ...oh that's right, you don't, because you're b o r e d. Eventually that shit gets redundant! Right? I mean, it just has to! I'm a planner, over-thinker, and lover of all things structured, but my GOD! Something ab "rooting" myself and another person for a long period of time just turns me right the hell on off. I need adventure, danger, a different face!

Needless to say my views on relationships are a bit unconventional, and the next person that asks me that bum ass question is going to get an ear-full of slightly cynical realism.

Monday, May 9, 2011

I just think this picture is awesome because I almost got bit by a snake today... it was small, and black, and pretty uninteresting compared to these...

Ya he llegado.

...complete with obnoxious hair, a positive outlook, and a shitty temper.
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...